As we grow up, our tastes change. We learn to like (and love) different things, from food to types of music to various hobbies, and we learn to accept the things that we cannot change.

But through this evolution, how does love fit in? Can your definition of love change?

I think that we all have a base idea and concept of what love "is" or "should be" - and we certainly know it when we feel it. But, the love we feel when we’re 15 can be different than the love we feel at 25, or 30, or 40.

A long time ago I had a discussion with my (now) boyfriend about this subject. He asked me if I had loved my ex-boyfriend. I told him that I wasn’t sure, that I thought I did at the time, but now I didn’t know. That doesn’t mean that the feelings I had at the time were any less real, more that my personal idea of what love is has changed. For example, when you are 15, you may love someone because they are exactly like you…and when you’re 25 you may love someone because they are exactly opposite, and everything you are not.

It’s hard to really quantify or articulate why we love the people that we do. The reasons may be obscure, and honestly sometimes you just don’t really know, and you have to go with your gut feeling. Your head will eventually catch up to what your heart already knows.

The idea that your concept of love changes over time can be frightening, but also exciting. It’s negative when you think of it in the way that you could marry someone and then 3-5 or 10 years later determine that you really didn’t love them after all, but in a more positive idea, it’s good that we are able to determine that love is more than a black and white issue, it’s an exciting and evolving thought and feeling. Just when you think that you can’t possibly love someone more, you find that you do. Maybe it’s when you have a child together, or it’s when you stand by their side through something traumatic (say a terminal illness). But, I think that love in its pure form and ideal definition, can only get better.

According to studies, most men marry not necessarily when they have found the right woman, but when the TIMING is right. That said, it’s not necessarily the person that’s wrong, it’s the time. You could meet a wonderful person at age 22, be with them for four years, then decide that they are not right for you. Then, at age 30 meet someone that is similar to the amazing person you knew at 22, but this time you marry them. Why? Because YOU were ready.

A large majority (81 percent) of married men agree with the statement that "you decided to marry because it was the right time in your life to settle down."

It’s so easy to be skeptical about love and relationships, especially if you have been burned in the past. But, I think it’s reassuring to know that (if you have had a bad relationship past) love doesn’t always have to hurt, it doesn’t have to be hard, and it doesn’t have to stay the same. If you’re lucky, you’ll find someone who is able to go through the highs, lows, and questions with you.

Overall, I think that the definition and feeling of love does, and should change. Though in following that line of thinking, it makes it imperative that your partner feel the same way. I think that the best relationships come from people who not only share similar core values and beliefs, but those that are able to mature and grow together, in the same direction. I think that a good relationship should be with someone who not only understands and supports you, but makes you want to be a better person.