I have to admit, when I first saw the headline in the New York Times, I was intrigued. Then, as I read the article and realized it was about my national sorority, I was interested. And then, I was appalled.

For those that haven’t seen it, check out the article that appeared in Sunday’s NYT. It is rapidly spreading around the blogosphere and news stations around the country. There was even mention of it on The View this morning.

Personally, I think it’s sad and degrading. It reverses every sterotype that social Greek organizations have fought long and hard to overcome. Sororities, at the core are supposed to be about team building, leadership, and building social and support networks.

Delta Zeta nationals are going to be under fire for a long time over this new scandal. Not only did they disband a sorority for being “unpopular”, they seemingly targeted women who didn’t “look the part” - and thought they would get away with it. Luckily the girls at DePauw were smarter than that, and now have the media on their side.

“Virtually everyone who didn’t fit a certain sorority member archetype was told to leave,” said Kate Holloway, a senior who withdrew from the chapter during its reorganization.

“I sensed the disrespect with which this was to be carried out and got fed up,” Ms. Holloway added. “I didn’t have room in my life for these women to come in and tell my sisters of three years that they weren’t needed.”

Mean girls may start out as the Queen bees…but in the real world, that only goes so far. I think it’s also interesting to wonder where the adult leadership was in this DePauw case. Where were the role models and advocates for the women of that chapter? It’s disappointing that the Greek life advisors of the university and the chapter advisors for the sorority were not a better guide and help for the chapter.

“They had these unassuming freshman girls downstairs with these plastic women from Indiana University, and 25 of my sisters hiding upstairs,” she said. “It was so fake, so completely dehumanized.”

I think that any girl, especially in a sorority, can identify and be angered by this. Even the pretty, thin, “acceptable” ones. Because in singling out the “ugly” or fat girls, it exposes ALL of our insecurities and vulnerabilities, and that is unforgiveable in a setting that is supposed to promote confidence and leadership. The point of being in a sorority isn’t to be pretty, it’s to join a community of sisters. Sure, nobody is ever all friends, and nobody is ever going to get along with everyone…but there is that common bond there.

The funny thing is, I don’t think that the women pictured were ugly at all. Sure, some were overweight, and some were a little “nerdy” looking…but they were all nice, normal, pretty women. We don’t all have to look the same. My sorority has certainly gotten hotter over the years, so much so that I joke that I don’t know if I could have gotten in anymore. That’s the other funny thing…people look down on sororities so much for being fake and superficial, and while many may be…many more are not. But even if you don’t believe in it, or agree with it - everyone I think feels that sterotype and knows it’s there. This DePauw incident just exposes that ugly (no pun intended) side of it all.

Strong Sisterhood…

Pink Clones?…

Mean Girls?…

I enjoyed being in a sorority, through its ups and downs. And, I’m sad that there are some women who do not get to experience it (in all its good and bad parts) because of sad sterotypes and bad press such as what is happening now. Sure, it will all come full circle and people will forget about it, but I’d rather not reinforce the negative sides and focus on the positives.

This article in the Post sparked my memory to something that I may wish to be, but probably never will obtain. There is no reason for it and nothing good about it. I’m actually quite ashamed to admit it but…

I’d love to be a member of the Madison Club or the Junior League (and not just for the good cookbooks). JL may be an attainable goal, but I don’t think Madison Club would accept an Asian, non Ivy league, non blue blood, non skinny, non Republican girl.

Some real Madison Girls

Why do I want to be a part of this “group” so bad - the sorority girl (OK, so I was one of those), the trophy wife, the WASP? Why would I want to become an empty shell and mold myself to what high society deems is important (thin, blonde and rich)? Who wants to be boring and vapid and pretentious and pretend to be something they are not?

I don’t really know what it is that attracts me to it. Maybe it’s just the idea of some Stepford fantasy where everything seems so easy and the world is your oyster. Summers in the Hamptons, winters in St. Tropez, golf tournaments and horse races and fundraisers and galas, oh my. It’s a world of luxury and power, high class and networking…and a world of secrets, loneliness, and boredom. Desperate Housewives indeed.


I guess in reality I wouldn’t want to be a part of something like this. Nor would I be able to really fit in. I’m sure I would get bored, and lord knows it would be exhausting trying to keep up appearances.

I know it’s sad that I think about wanting to be one of these girls, but at least I am a realist and know that for one, I never will be; and two, I don’t need to be that kind of person; and three I am a better person because I know those two things.

I was a sorority girl. I still am in many ways. I have been told both that I am a pretty stereotypical sorority girl, and also that I am not typical at all - by people who both love and hate Greek girls. I guess that will make perfect sense to those who know me.

For all the loving and hating of Greek life…I have to say I learned a lot being a part of it. I was never really one of the “cool” girls in my sorority - since I didn’t drink and party that much. Actually, I never really learned to drink beer until after college, and I am probably the only sorority alumna to have never done a beer bong.

Most people think that sorority girls are just a bunch of dimwitted party girls who like to drink and hook up a lot. That may be true in some cases, but I know plenty of women who were Greek that were far above that stereotype. My sorority for example, held the highest GPA for over five years of any on campus organization. We were leaders on campus, but also thought of as the “cute, fun” girls by the other fraternities and sororities. It was a good mix.

The stereotype

At my campus, the Greek women in general ruled the school. We were involved in every organization possible on campus, from student government to student media. Greek life had a finger on the pulse of the life of the university. I sincerely think that without it, student participation in university events would have been slim to none.

Personally, towards the end of my college career, I was heavily involved with Greek life and serving on the Panhellenic Executive Board, and I loved it more than I thought I would. It was a great experience, and gave me a lot of confidence and knowledge to be able to do some of the things I am doing now.

I believe that sorority life can be for everyone, it can be what you make of it, and what you want it to be. There was actually an article on CNN recently relating sorority life to Muslim life - and the creation of a Muslim sorority. It’s pretty interesting.

Many people I know who shunned sororities at first, either ended up joining and loving it, or ended up not joining and regretting it. I’m not going to lie and say I forged lifeling friendships or had THE TIME OF MY LIFE, but I will say that I think it gave me more than I ever imagined.

I think that for most people, sorority offers more positive than negative experiences, and even though there will be the hard times and the drama, I believe that in the end it can help shape your college experience, and also make you a better person.

But, what do I know, I’m just a dumb sorostitute, soror-i-whore, and sorority skank.

Some of my favorite stereotypical tips:

1. Purchase or make several Greek lettered shirts. They are all the rage, everyone wishes they had one.
2. Never let anyone call you a “slut,” but at the same time, make sure you sleep with lots of boys. Obvi.
3. The first thing you should do every morning is walk home. It’s not the “Walk of Shame” ladies, it’s the “Stride of Pride!”
4. Don’t forget, you’re very similar to a camel… eating isn’t a necessary daily activity. I’m just going to eat this celery.
5. You have to pay outrageous dues for sorority membership. Don’t worry, you’ll get cool t-shirts.
6. Never drink beer in large quantities. However, you are encouraged to drink “jungle juice” until you can’t feel feelings.
7. Glitter must be applied in half pound increments. God, glitter is so hot right now.
8. Take a pop music song and change the words to reflect your sorority’s coolness and dominance.
9. Get yourself a “24 hour key” to the local tanning place in town. Nothing says “I’m a sorority girl” like skin cancer.
10. If you must eat, your diet can only consist of: salad, fresh fruit, chocolate, cigarettes and bottled water.
11. Place your Greek letters somewhere on your AOL Instant Messenger buddy profile. Color coordination is preferred, but exceptions can totally be made with respect to holiday color schemes.
12. In preparation for rush: 1) Buy some cute new outfits. 2) Get your hair styled & highlighted. 3) Whiten your teeth.
13. No matter the number of fraternities on campus, your sorority is only cool enough to mix with a select few.
14. Class is not a place to learn. Rather, it’s a place to make your Greek presence felt.
15. Don’t worry about getting any STDs silly… you’re on birth control. Public Enemy #1: Venereal Diseases
16. Your new mating call will go like this, “I’m soooooo drunk… God, I’m sooooo drunk.”
17. Master the art of Instant Messenger; it will become your livelihood.
18. If your cell phone goes off in class just tell your Professor that you’re in a sorority.
19. Go to the gym more than any varsity athlete. Side note: Totally wear your Greek letters and makeup whenever you work out
20. During rush, Don’t bother to actually get to know the Rushees, a 5 minute conversation will do. Added points for cute shoes.

“Be more concerned with your character than your reputation
because your character is who you really are while your reputation is merely what others think of you.”

More goodness can also be found here.

And some of the more *sparkling* facts:

• 85 percent of the Fortune 500 executives are members of Greek organizations.
• 25 United States Presidents have belonged to Greek-letter organizations.
• Fraternities and sororities have maintained a higher grade point average than the undergraduate average at most universities.
• Greek organization members have a higher graduation rate than non-members.
• A study by the Center for the Study of College Fraternities found that fraternity and sorority members we significantly more satisfied with their college experience than non-members.
• 63 percent of the U.S. President’s cabinet since 1900 have been fraternity men.
• 77 percent of Who’s Who in America are Greek.